Blog

Short blog posts, journal entries, and random thoughts. Topics include a mix of personal and the world at large.

Final week

It took deep into October, but we’re finally getting some proper autumn weather here in San Francisco. After the seemingly endless heatwaves and mountainous wildfires, the cool crispness of Fall and the slight chills have arrived to welcome us to what is in my opinion the best parts of the year (even this, the year of COVID). Temperatures during the daytime are so mild that I can keep the windows shades open without the sun heating up the room, receiving those all-important vitamin Ds naturally.

This week marks the final few days I will be living at home - I am due to move out on Sunday the 1st of November. It’s exciting time indeed, though I’m sure I’ll be fighting momentary bouts of anxiety throughout the week. Living by myself alone will be a tremendously huge change, and there’s surely plenty of variables and things I’m can’t even imagine right now that goes along with it. I won’t get the complete picture of how it’s going to be until the actual move happens, but that’s okay: it’s part of the learning process.

Independent living is something we all have to do sooner or later. In my case, it took until my 30s to do because I never did the “go away fro college’ thing like most of my peers. I have the cultural privilege of not getting kicked out of the house soon as I became a legal adult, and for that I am forever grateful. However, the time has come to venture out alone and to take care of myself wholly and completely. The milk in the fridge and the toilet paper in the bathroom aren’t going to magically refill itself anymore.

This is also the final week I’ll have a commute to work: I am moving to place that’s extremely close to campus. It’s going to rather nice to take the 10 minute daily walk to work, under this fine autumnal air. This period of working-from-home have reinforced my want of living within walking distance to the workplace; a long commute on public transport is something I don’t ever want to go back to.

I hope you all will have a great week.

This thing loves crips autumnal air as well.

No trip to China

As we roll deeper into October and the final months of the year, the sad reality is finally dawning on me that I am not traveling back home to China this year. Stating the obvious: the coronavirus pandemic have made doing so absolutely untenable. The yearly trip to Guangzhou to see family on my dad’s side is always a wonderful and loving time, and it’s rather disappointing we won’t be able to do the annual meetup this year. The steak of six straight years of spending a few weeks of winter in China will come to an end.

The holidays are a difficult time of the year to be stuck in our homes and unable to see friends and family. Humans are social animals, after all, and at this point even the most ardent introverts are feeling the pain of the lack in social interactions (that’s me!) Therefore I don’t blame anyone for meeting up for Thanksgiving, even with all the risk associated with COVID-19. For some of us, our grandparents are quite up there in age, and who knows if they’ll make another turn of the planet. I think it’s important to take all the necessary precautions (mask up!) to see them before this calendar year is over.

Fortunately, my grandparents are on this side of the pond, so the inability to travel to China this year wouldn’t be detrimental.

Further good news: while much of America is experiencing a rebounding rise in COVID numbers, San Francisco have good enough stats to enter a new phase of reopening. The city’s restaurants have already been allowed to open indoor dining at a reduced capacity, and now, more places of commerce will be allowed to join that group. In a year of never-ending horrible news, how San Francisco have handled the pandemic response is something to be happy and proud of. Despite the sky-high housing costs, I am really glad to be a citizen of this city and county.

Our friend group can feel less guilty about gathering for Thanksgiving in a month’s time.

Where's the furniture?

I am moving in two weeks, and part of that process is buying some new pieces of furniture. Nothing mysterious here: I am going to IKEA. I really dig the company’s furniture designs (and the meatballs from the dinning hall), and the notoriously bare instructions don’t flummox me one bit. It’s about convenience, too: for an impatiently anxious person like me, it’s helpful to do all the furniture shopping at one place.

However, there’s a problem: the bloody pandemic. It seems I am amongst the many with grand moving plans during these times (waving goodbye to the folks leaving this great state of California), so there’s a bit of a shortage at IKEA. Friends of mine went there a few weeks ago in hopes to buy some pieces, but returned home empty handed because the ones they want were on backorder. I’ve got my fingers crossed that in two weeks’ time I won’t encounter the same fate, though I’m quite okay placing the mattress on the floor for some time (hashtag bachelor life).

I don’t need that much new furniture anyways, just a bed frame and a large bookshelf. Ever since I read Marie Kondo I’ve tried to keep personal items to a minimal, so in terms of what I need to buy and what I need to move, I don’t really have that much relative to the typical person. Except for books: I am a cruel tyrant to trees because I refuse to stop buying books in paper form, rather than the far more ecological digital format. If I didn’t have physical books, I can move everything I have (sans furniture) in two suitcases.

The 1st of November cannot come fast enough; my impatiently anxious self is eager to get this change done and move on to other beautiful things.

No new iPhone for me?

Am I getting the new iPhone this year?

Ever since the iPhone 7 - coinciding nicely with attaining a stable income - I’ve done the yearly upgrade to my Apple smartphone like clockwork. While indeed it’s really nice to have the latest and greatest shiny thing every one turn of the calendar, my reason for upgrading annually is for the improvements to the camera system. Apple continues to make leaps every year on the iPhone’s photographic capabilities, and as a hobbyist photographer, it’s a useful tool worth the upgrade cost.

Obviously, 2020 is no ordinary year. With the global pandemic shutting down all manners of travel, and relegating us to our homes more so than ever, there’s really not much opportunity for photography to happen. Is it worth getting the new iPhone 12 when the usage rate is this low? I’m not so sure.

But there’s another problem: Apple put the newest camera technology only in the largest of the iPhone 12 lineup, the Pro Max. Having gone back to a “regular size” iPhone 11 Pro after a string of plus-sized iPhones, I’ve come to prefer the practicality and convenience of a smaller device. It’s far easier to fit into pant pockets, and I can take photos with a single-hand, whereas the largest iPhone would require two hands just to steady the phone body. Apple going back to putting the best cameras only in the largest iPhone is putting me into quite the first-world dilemma: what’s more important? Portability, or picture quality?

I have a strong feeling that if I do upgrade this year, I’m going to reluctantly choose the iPhone 12 Pro Max. The size is going to take some time to get reacquainted with, but the improvements that comes with the larger sensor and new stabilization is ultimately worth the trade-off. I want the best picture quality possible.

Let’s see what happens in a few weeks, when the Pro Max becomes available for purchase.

Heavy sunk cost

I am happy to report: I defeated the sunk-cost fallacy.

Sunk-cost fallacy is when you’ve invested so much time and resources (read: money) into a thing, that you are reluctant to pull the plug because of the perceived waste of said time and resources. So desperate for maximum utility that it blinds and binds you from the potential benefits of letting something go. In my case, the sunk-cost was the enormous sum towards buying and owning the 911 GT3. I was so financially invested into that car that selling it right now would mean a hugely negative return on that money - it hasn’t yet amortize over a long enough period of time.

So I was effectively locked into the expensive sports car, all the while hampering the progress of other life changes. The GT3 was not a financial albatross, but it was enough of a burden on my monthly budget that any large expenditure would require some heavy consultation and thought.

Recent circumstances have made it clear that I need to move to the west side of San Francisco, for many reasons, primarily to be closer to campus. The additional monthly rental cost means keeping the GT3 would have been quite difficult. I could have made it work, but ultimately, having the freedom to do other things triumphs over my absolute love for the GT3. So, I sold the 911, and along with it the many tens of thousands of dollars I’ve already put into the car, so naively thinking I would keep the GT3 forever, and therefore be able to amortize that expense over decades.

2020 had different plans - for all of us, I suppose. It was a tough decision to let the GT3 go, but I have only gratitude for the opportunity of a lifetime to own such an amazing car.

The active mind

Zen buddhist philosophy preaches we should always stay in the present moment. The mind wants to wander on about way too many thoughts, and it’s imperative for you to recognize it and then detach yourself from the constantly thinking mind. Take a deep breath and feel the presence in the now. Focus the sensation onto the extremities of the body: the fingers typing on a laptop, your feet touching the cold embrace of the floor. The mind will want to fight you on this, but anytime you see it go off once again onto yet another thought string, let it go and return focus to your breathing.

This practice is particularly useful during stressful situations, or when things aren’t especially going your way. Negative thoughts of fear, anxiety, or sadness will flood the brain channels during these times, and it can be quite overwhelming if you are unable to keep attention to the present moment. The mind will draw from your pass memories, or create future scenarios in order to torture you; I think we can all attest the mind is very good at doing both when we most need it to be calm.

Being in the present is also surprisingly useful when things are going well. Surely you’ve experienced this: the night before a huge trip or big life event, it’s rather difficult to get a good night’s sleep. The mind is preoccupied with great anticipation for the positive things that’s about to happen, and it cannot wait for you to get this proper sleep first - it wants to time travel. So there you are, lying in bed wide awake, the mind full of sweet scenarios of what’s to come. Or perhaps you’re like me: anxious about those future event turning out badly.

Sometimes the mind wanderings are so strong that you just have to let it be. Resign to that fact it’s going to be active for awhile, and simply observe the thoughts as they come and go. It’s useless to waste additional energy to fight it - just observe. The mind will quiet down eventually, and you can then go to sleep.

Selling my old Macs

In the paradigm to have one laptop to do all my computing needs - I recently purchased a 16-inch MacBook Pro will lots of delicious options - I have to sell my remaining machines to the second-hand market. Not wanting to spend the time nor energy on the likes of Craigslist and eBay just for a slightly higher return on price, I elected to go with third-party resellers that guarantees a price up front. All there is for me to do is box up the computers nicely and drive it to the local Fedex store.

For my old 15-inch MacBook Pro, I went with Apple’s own trade-in program. Customers can either directly apply the credit towards a new purchase, or take an Apple gift card for a future date. I did the latter because at the time I was not yet ready to order this 16-inch MacBook Pro I am currently typing on. It turns out, the Apple trade-in program is handled by a third-party company: Phobio. It does feel a bit bait-and-switch because the the Apple website makes it look like the reputation of Apple is behind the trade-in, but in reality you are to deal with Phobio. Should something go wrong, Apple support isn’t going to do anything - they’ll instead refer you to Phobio.

That’s not exactly confidence inspiring, but I am happy to report I was successful in getting the money for my 15-inch MacBook Pro as promised.

For my circa-2017 27-inch iMac, I went with the company called Cash For Your Mac, after reading solid reviews about the San Diego company on the forums. Like most resellers, they will pay for the shipping, but because it’s a huge iMac, they don’t provide the box. If you need a box, Cash For Your Mac is happy to sell you a bespoke one for $50. I work in IT on a university campus, so lucky enough I was able to grab a spare original iMac box from work. Many rolls of bubble-wrap later, the machine got down to San Diego in two days, and another three days later I received the check in the mail. The transaction is as painless as it gets.

Now that I’ve consolidated my entire digital life onto this 16-inch MacBook Pro, up next is to pursue a solid backup strategy. After all, these mobile machines are relatively easy to lose compared to something stationary like a workstation. I would hate to lose absolutely everything in an instant.