Mortality — Blog — Healy Chen

Death of a coworker

It’s a tremendously sad day indeed to find out that one of our coworkers has passed away. We’ve not heard from her all last week, so on the behest of HR, SFPD paid a wellness visit to the coworker’s address on file. Our worst inklings were unfortunately confirmed. The deceased has been battling chronic health issues for as long as I’ve known her. To die so incredibly earlier than you’re naturally suppose to is an absolute tragedy.

I think the news hit the older coworkers more intensely. Seeing someone close to your age die so suddenly is a rather rude wake-up call. You start examining your own mortality, questioning whether you’ve forsaken long-term health for more immediate pleasures. Us Knowledge workers who sit in front of a computer all day have a steep hill to climb in terms of combating the deterioration that comes with age. A majority of my coworkers in their 40s and 50s are not the paragons of health, I’m sorry to point out.

For me, the fear of death is about the sensation of not being here (rather than fearing the agony of death). It’s the ultimate form of fear of missing out. That's why I’ve long been on the exercise, eat right, sleep plenty plan ever since I’ve graduated from university. While aesthetic improvements are nice, the actual goal is longevity. I don’t want to be gone prematurely! I want to be around for all the fun and not so fun that a full lifetime has to offer.

I hope the deceased did not suffer. To have worked with you is a privilege. Rest in peace.

Red in the morning, blue in the evening sun.

Sonny

It was a somber workday yesterday. A coworker got the news that her mother is diagnosed with cancer, and not the good kind. Not to say there is a good kind of cancer, but you know what I mean. My own mother has had breast cancer, which while scary, is imminently survivable. She’s in remission to this day (god willing).

Obviously, my coworkers was in a bit of shock. As a coworker, I was at a lost of what to say, other than how sorry I was to hear the sad news. Was there more to be said? I’m not so sure. It’s tempting to encourage him to take the rest of the day off, but people handle bad news differently. Perhaps being at work and actually doing the work is a needed distraction from the difficulties to come.

It’s never fun when human mortality surfaces right front and center. Most of us go through life running away from contemplating our mortality. That in turn governs how we act each day. We think we have all the time in the world, but reality can snatch it away in a quick second. A normal workday will be utterly interrupted by the news your mother has terminal cancer. What a cruel joke! Just a minute before, another day was going swimmingly.

Sometimes you wish there’s a button to turn back the time. Like there is in a role-playing video game.

The constant contemplation of death should influence our actions. To not sweat the small stuff, be quick to forgive, and say the things you want to say now. Because it can all go away in an instant.