Blog

Short blog posts, journal entries, and random thoughts. Topics include a mix of personal and the world at large.

Where's the furniture?

I am moving in two weeks, and part of that process is buying some new pieces of furniture. Nothing mysterious here: I am going to IKEA. I really dig the company’s furniture designs (and the meatballs from the dinning hall), and the notoriously bare instructions don’t flummox me one bit. It’s about convenience, too: for an impatiently anxious person like me, it’s helpful to do all the furniture shopping at one place.

However, there’s a problem: the bloody pandemic. It seems I am amongst the many with grand moving plans during these times (waving goodbye to the folks leaving this great state of California), so there’s a bit of a shortage at IKEA. Friends of mine went there a few weeks ago in hopes to buy some pieces, but returned home empty handed because the ones they want were on backorder. I’ve got my fingers crossed that in two weeks’ time I won’t encounter the same fate, though I’m quite okay placing the mattress on the floor for some time (hashtag bachelor life).

I don’t need that much new furniture anyways, just a bed frame and a large bookshelf. Ever since I read Marie Kondo I’ve tried to keep personal items to a minimal, so in terms of what I need to buy and what I need to move, I don’t really have that much relative to the typical person. Except for books: I am a cruel tyrant to trees because I refuse to stop buying books in paper form, rather than the far more ecological digital format. If I didn’t have physical books, I can move everything I have (sans furniture) in two suitcases.

The 1st of November cannot come fast enough; my impatiently anxious self is eager to get this change done and move on to other beautiful things.

No new iPhone for me?

Am I getting the new iPhone this year?

Ever since the iPhone 7 - coinciding nicely with attaining a stable income - I’ve done the yearly upgrade to my Apple smartphone like clockwork. While indeed it’s really nice to have the latest and greatest shiny thing every one turn of the calendar, my reason for upgrading annually is for the improvements to the camera system. Apple continues to make leaps every year on the iPhone’s photographic capabilities, and as a hobbyist photographer, it’s a useful tool worth the upgrade cost.

Obviously, 2020 is no ordinary year. With the global pandemic shutting down all manners of travel, and relegating us to our homes more so than ever, there’s really not much opportunity for photography to happen. Is it worth getting the new iPhone 12 when the usage rate is this low? I’m not so sure.

But there’s another problem: Apple put the newest camera technology only in the largest of the iPhone 12 lineup, the Pro Max. Having gone back to a “regular size” iPhone 11 Pro after a string of plus-sized iPhones, I’ve come to prefer the practicality and convenience of a smaller device. It’s far easier to fit into pant pockets, and I can take photos with a single-hand, whereas the largest iPhone would require two hands just to steady the phone body. Apple going back to putting the best cameras only in the largest iPhone is putting me into quite the first-world dilemma: what’s more important? Portability, or picture quality?

I have a strong feeling that if I do upgrade this year, I’m going to reluctantly choose the iPhone 12 Pro Max. The size is going to take some time to get reacquainted with, but the improvements that comes with the larger sensor and new stabilization is ultimately worth the trade-off. I want the best picture quality possible.

Let’s see what happens in a few weeks, when the Pro Max becomes available for purchase.

Heavy sunk cost

I am happy to report: I defeated the sunk-cost fallacy.

Sunk-cost fallacy is when you’ve invested so much time and resources (read: money) into a thing, that you are reluctant to pull the plug because of the perceived waste of said time and resources. So desperate for maximum utility that it blinds and binds you from the potential benefits of letting something go. In my case, the sunk-cost was the enormous sum towards buying and owning the 911 GT3. I was so financially invested into that car that selling it right now would mean a hugely negative return on that money - it hasn’t yet amortize over a long enough period of time.

So I was effectively locked into the expensive sports car, all the while hampering the progress of other life changes. The GT3 was not a financial albatross, but it was enough of a burden on my monthly budget that any large expenditure would require some heavy consultation and thought.

Recent circumstances have made it clear that I need to move to the west side of San Francisco, for many reasons, primarily to be closer to campus. The additional monthly rental cost means keeping the GT3 would have been quite difficult. I could have made it work, but ultimately, having the freedom to do other things triumphs over my absolute love for the GT3. So, I sold the 911, and along with it the many tens of thousands of dollars I’ve already put into the car, so naively thinking I would keep the GT3 forever, and therefore be able to amortize that expense over decades.

2020 had different plans - for all of us, I suppose. It was a tough decision to let the GT3 go, but I have only gratitude for the opportunity of a lifetime to own such an amazing car.

The active mind

Zen buddhist philosophy preaches we should always stay in the present moment. The mind wants to wander on about way too many thoughts, and it’s imperative for you to recognize it and then detach yourself from the constantly thinking mind. Take a deep breath and feel the presence in the now. Focus the sensation onto the extremities of the body: the fingers typing on a laptop, your feet touching the cold embrace of the floor. The mind will want to fight you on this, but anytime you see it go off once again onto yet another thought string, let it go and return focus to your breathing.

This practice is particularly useful during stressful situations, or when things aren’t especially going your way. Negative thoughts of fear, anxiety, or sadness will flood the brain channels during these times, and it can be quite overwhelming if you are unable to keep attention to the present moment. The mind will draw from your pass memories, or create future scenarios in order to torture you; I think we can all attest the mind is very good at doing both when we most need it to be calm.

Being in the present is also surprisingly useful when things are going well. Surely you’ve experienced this: the night before a huge trip or big life event, it’s rather difficult to get a good night’s sleep. The mind is preoccupied with great anticipation for the positive things that’s about to happen, and it cannot wait for you to get this proper sleep first - it wants to time travel. So there you are, lying in bed wide awake, the mind full of sweet scenarios of what’s to come. Or perhaps you’re like me: anxious about those future event turning out badly.

Sometimes the mind wanderings are so strong that you just have to let it be. Resign to that fact it’s going to be active for awhile, and simply observe the thoughts as they come and go. It’s useless to waste additional energy to fight it - just observe. The mind will quiet down eventually, and you can then go to sleep.

Selling my old Macs

In the paradigm to have one laptop to do all my computing needs - I recently purchased a 16-inch MacBook Pro will lots of delicious options - I have to sell my remaining machines to the second-hand market. Not wanting to spend the time nor energy on the likes of Craigslist and eBay just for a slightly higher return on price, I elected to go with third-party resellers that guarantees a price up front. All there is for me to do is box up the computers nicely and drive it to the local Fedex store.

For my old 15-inch MacBook Pro, I went with Apple’s own trade-in program. Customers can either directly apply the credit towards a new purchase, or take an Apple gift card for a future date. I did the latter because at the time I was not yet ready to order this 16-inch MacBook Pro I am currently typing on. It turns out, the Apple trade-in program is handled by a third-party company: Phobio. It does feel a bit bait-and-switch because the the Apple website makes it look like the reputation of Apple is behind the trade-in, but in reality you are to deal with Phobio. Should something go wrong, Apple support isn’t going to do anything - they’ll instead refer you to Phobio.

That’s not exactly confidence inspiring, but I am happy to report I was successful in getting the money for my 15-inch MacBook Pro as promised.

For my circa-2017 27-inch iMac, I went with the company called Cash For Your Mac, after reading solid reviews about the San Diego company on the forums. Like most resellers, they will pay for the shipping, but because it’s a huge iMac, they don’t provide the box. If you need a box, Cash For Your Mac is happy to sell you a bespoke one for $50. I work in IT on a university campus, so lucky enough I was able to grab a spare original iMac box from work. Many rolls of bubble-wrap later, the machine got down to San Diego in two days, and another three days later I received the check in the mail. The transaction is as painless as it gets.

Now that I’ve consolidated my entire digital life onto this 16-inch MacBook Pro, up next is to pursue a solid backup strategy. After all, these mobile machines are relatively easy to lose compared to something stationary like a workstation. I would hate to lose absolutely everything in an instant.

For the kids

The group of people I feel most sorry for during this COVID pandemic - outside of those directly affected with the horrible disease - is the children. To have this period of tremendous growth and learning so utterly upended by the lockdowns is going to affect the kids negatively for a very long time to come. Especially the younger ones: their naiveté may shield them from any rational fears and worries, but I think the damage done is subconscious. Not being able to see their friends or have any other social interaction beyond their own parents, for going on seven months now, cannot not possibly be good for their growing psyche.

It sucks for the older kids as well. I can’t imagine what it’s like to have the fun parts high school - proms and various gatherings - be taken away. The current juniors and seniors will never get those experiences back. The answer to the question “How was your senior prom?” will always be a resigning sadness, followed by an explanation of how there wasn’t a prom that year because of COVID. Missed weddings for adults can always be done at a later date. High school prom? That’s a once in a lifetime thing you simply don’t get to do again.

I really feel sorry for the kids.

A coworker of mine brings his daughter in to work whenever he has to physically come to campus. The kid is only four years old, so she has zero idea as to the rhythm and reason of the current predicament. Having to attend class remotely is just another new adventure in her brief life thus far. Her daily cheeriness every time I see them is something of a bright spot. Ignorance can indeed be bliss in this situation, but sometimes I can’t help but agonize at the subliminal hurt that all of this craziness is causing the kid, ramifications that I don’t think we yet know will occur down the road.

As much as I try to humor the daughter and indulge in chat with her, deep down I know what’s most important for her is to return back to the pre-COVID normal. To be able to once gain see and hangout with peers her age, and do fun stuff on the weekends.

No driving for young man

Here’s the grand total of how many miles I drove during the month of September: 74.

That amount marks an all-time low in monthly miles for my 911 GT3. The perfect confluence of wildfires and unhealthy air meant there was no opportunity to take the car out for weekend drives. I mean, I still could have done it, but the responsible thing to do with air quality being so poor is to not add more pollution needlessly. These fancy sports cars are toys, after all, and not what I would call essential motoring. And this is coming from a person who absolutely adores cars.

During this time I am still physically going into work, and it’s thanks to the generosity of my brother and father, who have taken up taxying duties, that I am able to make the trip back and forth. In an ideal world, I would commute with the GT3, but here in the real world, there isn’t a place at home to safely park it for that to be feasible. Street parking in my neighborhood is both highly contested and rather dangerous. Just this past weekend, an idiot in a Ford Mustang (it’s always a Ford Mustang, or a Dodge Charger/Challenger) did donuts on our intersection and then promptly spun into the parked Corolla of our neighbor’s.

That’s the sort of anxiety I don’t need on top of my already chronic anxiety issues.

I had plans this year to move out of the house and rent a spot that’s very close to work. That way I can simply walk to work instead of having to slog in on the commute. One less stress item off my mental list would be certainly be beneficial - and well worth the rental cost. I’d have easier access to the 911 as well, since it’s parked close to campus. Of course, the pandemic utterly destroyed all of our 2020 plans, and as of right now I’m just happy I still have a job, and a proverbial roof over my head.

We’ll return to our regularly scheduled programming soon enough.