Blog

Short blog posts, journal entries, and random thoughts. Topics include a mix of personal and the world at large.

The walls are closing in

Well, this is not good. My best friend is struggling heavily with COVID symptoms since he tested positive about a week ago. Mild symptoms they are not, though thankfully it’s not severe to the point of an ICU visit. It’s this horrible middle that makes the whole experience terribly unenjoyable. My friend puts it succinctly, “I wouldn’t wish this on anyone.”

Poor dude. Fingers are crossed that he pulls through in due time.

Concurrently, my housemate got contact-traced to an exposure at her work, so she’s in self quarantine conditions until the test result comes back (negative, hopefully). By the virtue of living under the same roof, that means I’m also not going anywhere for a relatively while. I won’t be going home to see my parents this weekend, nor am I visiting my friends and their kids. Relax, these people have been in my “bubble” so to speak since the beginning of this pandemic.

I also got an email yesterday that there’s been two cases at work on campus! Thankfully, the two infected persons work away from our area in the library, so the chances of it directly affecting me is very slim. In some ways I’m genuinely surprised I haven’t caught COVID myself, given that I’m been physically going into work many times a week. I take them maximum amount of precaution of course, but luck plays a part in it as well.

In the case of my best friend, he had barely left his house in the weeks prior to catching COVID, and yet here he is. The rest of the household is negative, too, so it’s really down to a case of super bad luck. In all honestly we’ve all taken some risks during this time (a friend flew home from another State!), and it’s due to good fortune that we’ve come out unscathed (thus far). Knock on wood furiously.

COVID cases and daily deaths are still at all-time highs in America. Combine with the slow vaccine rollout, now is definitely not the time to let our guards down. I shall continue to go nowhere (other than to get groceries) for many months to come.

I am stressed

“Is it stressful? Or do you just talk fast?”

And just like that, I regained some perspective. I was indeed stressed. A big thank you to the customer for asking. It was a packed day at work, with many items on the schedule. I felt the entire weight of it on my shoulders, that it was up to me to make sure it gets done. So perhaps I wasn’t paying full attention to each customer, merely trying to get through all of it to the end of the work day.

My reply was meek: “Probably a bit of both.” I do tend to talk quickly.

No matter how much training you do, stress can still creep up on you. No amount of sleeping the proper hours, eating the correct foods, exercising regularly, and studying philosophy, can prevent it. Doing those things only lessens the impact and severity when the stress does hit. A year ago I would surely have fallen apart.

After that interaction, I was able to slow myself down. Temporarily detaching from the situation - thanks the kindness of that customer - allowed for the realization that it has been a rather stressful day. I should have been able to see that for myself without external input. But, if it was that easy, my face wouldn’t still be breaking out in stress pimples, even as I’m well into my 30s.

Improvement comes incrementally: the ability to handle stress only comes with more doing and more experience. Unless I choose the life of an aesthetic monk living in the woods (sounds great, actually), stress is going to be a part of everyday life for the rest of time. I’ll be better at it as I go along.

On my own

It’s been a little over two months since I’ve moved out on my own, and I have to say it’s going quite well. This “new” place finally feels lived in, and completely my own. For awhile it felt like I was off on some long vacation, and living in an AirBnb. That feeling was especially acute when I wake up in the morning. Having stared up at the same ceiling for nearly two decades, the transition to a new one takes some getting used to. These days it’s become rather familiar.

It’s nice to be able to set my own schedule, to eat whenever I want. Back with my parents, dinners is always at 6:00 PM, so I sort of had to schedule my day around that. On my own, I basically eat whenever I feel like eating. Of course, I’m also responsible for buying all the groceries: the milk no longer magically replenishes itself when it runs low. Thank god I’m not a glutton for variety in food. Being content with eating the same thing everyday means I can buy something in bulk from Costco and eat that for a whole week.

Of course, living within walking distance to a mall with a proper food court means should I fancy not cooking, I can always get some take-out easily. Being so close to everything is one of the main attractions of moving to this place. I don’t think I can go back to having a commute to work, now that I can simply walk to it everyday. To be able to take care of most of my life needs all from within walking distance (even my dentist is only a few blocks away) is the stuff of dreams. A lifestyle I thought only possible in super dense Asian cities.

A few years back when I was traveling in Korea, I remarked at how small and efficient our AirBnb is. No bigger than about 250 square-feet, it was fully featured nonetheless: full kitchen, full bath, and a place for a bed. I thought wouldn’t it be great to have something like this in San Francisco, for a reasonable amount of rent. Turns out, in renting my current space, I found it! A studio with just enough space for everything. The small footprint makes it incredibly easy to clean. Whoever invented the Swiffer: I salute you.

I can’t wait for a time when I can actually go outside of the house for fun. I’m rooting for you, coronavirus vaccine!

Time is of the essense

Last week, Costco had a sale on face marks. Only five dollars for a pack of 50! Remember during the early days of this pandemic? When there was a shortage of medical face masks for sale? I once paid for a similar box of 50 for 50 dollars! Steep as that price may be, it was absolutely paramount that we protect ourselves.

Comparatively then, five dollars for 50 masks is an unmitigated steal. So I order four boxes. That should last me well into the rest of year (I’m not the type to reuse a mask then next day). I am optimistic that vaccines will proliferate quicker and quicker, that soon we’ll be back to some semblance of normal. However, I don’t think I’ll be stopping mask use even after that time. I may not wear them anymore when I’m at work or in a private setting with friends, but in public spaces I’m going to be Asian about it and continue to wear masks for a long time to come.

I received the shipment from Costco, and sadly only three boxes arrive. I had a decision to make: do I spend the time calling customer support to contest this? The decision is no: my time is worth way more than the five dollars I’d be (potentially) clawing back. Time is the most valuable commodity we have, and choosing to spend it wisely is just about the best thing we can do for ourselves. Chasing after a human error for less than ten dollars is not that.

Similarly, I don’t bother returning things that’s of a similarly low value. The hour that it cumulatively takes to package the thing and then drive it to logistics store could be better spent elsewhere. Like reading a book, for example, or partake in a lesson of guitar. As an adult that makes solid money, I can afford to essentially spend money to save time. Or in this case, forsake money to save time. Either which way, it’s very worth it.

Not wanting something

What do you do on weekends when stay-at-home order is still in affect (in fact as of right now it’s indefinite)? I watch videos on Youtube. Of course, that’s after I’ve read for an hour and studied Korean for an hour, but you get the idea. Difficult as it may be for a productivity-focused person, I’m not above watching videos mindlessly for a few hours.

A channel I was watching this weekend is called ‘JDM Masters’. Some what looks to be an Indonesian guy that grew up in Britain and now lives in Japan is showcasing Japanese car enthusiasm. It includes new and iconic Japanese cars I grew up admiring, and the various tuning shops throughout the country. It’s a bittersweet reminder of my own fabulous trip to Japan a few years back; due to the current circumstances It’s not likely I’ll be able to make a return trip anytime soon.

What’s dangerous about watching Youtube car videos is that I then become tempted to buy.. Even though I’ve had a string of cars and am currently a loving owner of a BMW M2 Competition, a true petrol-head can never have too many cars. A new Honda Civic Type R would really scratch the front-wheel-drive performance car itch. Watching a tour of the Subaru STI Gallery made me miss my old Impreza WRX STI: perhaps I should buy a copy of the latest version!

While I can certainly afford to get another car, it would be a bit reckless both financially and from a utility standpoint. I’m reminded of a saying I quite like: not wanting something is as good as having that thing. Rampant materialism is never the solution to happiness. Take it from someone who have spent six-figures on a car. Though it would be great to buy a Toyota 86 and modify it to my taste, that’s not the path for me at this moment in time.

I’m destined to drive the M2 - and only the M2 - for quite awhile.

Bye bye, Facebook!

Well, I finally did it: I am completely divorced from the greater Facebook empire.

WhatsApp - the popular messaging app owned by Facebook - will begin sharing user data with its parent company starting on February 8th. Previously it was possible to opt out of this farce, but no longer. You either share your personal data, or you don’t use the app at all. The absorption of WhatsApp into the Facebook ecosystem will finally be complete in a few weeks’ time.

This was the last straw for me, and yesterday my entire friend group migrated over to Signal. It seems plenty of others did as well. Signal is a cross-platform messaging app, backed by a non-profit company, that promises complete privacy. Messages are end-to-end encrypted, user data are not harvested for anything, and messages can be set to expire, deleted forever.

Perhaps more so than the privacy benefits, I really want nothing to do with Facebook. I’ve long stopped using the main Facebook app, and quit instagram some years ago. Those platforms are mindless time-sucks that negatively affects mental health. Not once since deletion did I ever pined to go back to instagram, even though I dearly miss the app’s early days. When it was just the photographs, and nothing else.

I kept using WhatsApp because even though Facebook bought the company, it was completely standalone and had no integration with anything else. A walled garden compared to Facebook’s own messenger app, where content is mined for target advertisement. That will no longer be the case come February 8th, which is why I’ve jumped ship to Signal.

Farewell, Facebook.

That escalated quickly

It was just a normal work day as I headed to a 11:00 AM meeting. Half hour later, I check the twitter feed and come to find out the U.S. Capitol building has been taken over by rabid Trump supporters. On the day congress was to certify the 2020 Presidential election for Joe Biden, I was surprised at the utter lack of additional security. How was it this easy to storm the Capitol?

With Trump talking of what a pivotal day January 6th was, egging on supporters to show up in DC and make a stand, you’d think the protection levels around the Capitol would be heighten. I guess not.

Insurrection. Attempted coup. Things I didn’t think I’d ever see in America, but I guess there’s a first time for everything. This is the consequence of the losing side refusing to concede, even against all hard evidence. instead, Trump has fanned the flames of grievance, making false claims of a stolen election. His followers bought into the madness, and yesterday’s events in DC was the natural endgame. At least one person who stormed the Capitol has died. There goes America’s moral high ground on peaceful transitions of power.

Obviously, it was rather difficult to focus on work during the latter half of yesterday. It’s tough to peel away from twitter when such unprecedented calamity is happening right now. My mind was on Washington DC, yet during moments I had to remind myself there’s actually work still to be done. It was a surreal and floating sensation, my concentration split into two halves. The half focused on the news in stunned disbelief.

I have to say there was some satisfying schadenfreude in seeing some Republicans finally confront the horror, reaping the results of what they’ve sown the past four years. A person’s character. matters, especially for someone occupying the highest office in the land. Let’s not make this mistake ever again. Two more weeks until decency returns to the executive branch.