Blog

Short blog posts, journal entries, and random thoughts. Topics include a mix of personal and the world at large.

The itch to spend

Hello! I’ve returned from a brief one week hiatus. Thanks to daylight savings time changing the clock one hour forwards, I spent last week recovering from the regulation-imposed jet lag. Even a person like me with relatively clean sleeping patterns struggled to acquiesce to the time change. Going to sleep at the new “normal time” was difficult, and so is waking up at the new normal time. For the first time this whole year, I actually hit the snooze button. Groggy. Where did the sun go in the morning?

It went to the evening hours, obviously. I concede that it is indeed quite nice to still have some semblance of sun after getting off work. Last Friday I had a lovely time with my friend and her pet dog at the local park. I guess on that alone, I would vote to keep daylight savings time constant, rather than having standard time year round. What the powers must do is simply pick one! All this time change nonsense absolutely wrecks our circadian rhythm for at least one whole week. It’s not healthy in the slightest.

You know that feeling when you’ve got some free money in the bank account, and you get that itch to spend it? How can we not: we get bombarded with advertisements every single day. The Internet services we know and love are basically advertising machines. I have started paying for YouTube Premium, however. No ads when I watch YouTube. Ever.

So I was looking at (finally) getting a standing desk to replace this IKEA Galant that I’ve had since my college days. In the name of health (I’d be able to adjust the height of the desk specific to me) and novelty (who doesn’t like a fresh new bamboo work surface?) I began a search on the Internet. Turns out the major players in the standing desk market all seem to be having Spring sales. What would have been a thousand dollars - for the specification of table I want - is now only $700.

After sleeping on it, I decided against buying a standing desk. Primarily because it feels wrong to throw away a perfectly good table, albeit one that cannot adjust height. I don’t want to spend the time playing the Craigslist games in trying to sell the old one. Trashing such a bulky item also isn’t as simple as putting it in the bin. My IKEA Galant remains a sturdy and useable desk, so it remains.

At least you have one!

I have a coworker who maintains miserly tendencies, even though he makes around the same money as everyone else in the office. His problem? He is what we would call “house poor.” Too much of him and his wife’s income go towards servicing the mortgage. But hey, at least he got in when the interest rates were low, and houses weren’t all above one million dollars around here. Imagine paying 7% on a 30-year loan! You can buy a whole other house in the midwest with the combined interest payments.

And at least the coworker has a house! I on the other hand have zero allusions about home ownership. There’s no way I can afford one on my salary, unless I meet a partner who makes vastly more than I do (and I make above the U.S. median household income already). If the potential partner makes around the same as me, we would be house poor just like my coworker and his wife. Definitely not a situation I want to dig myself into for 30 years.

For my lonesome, renting continuously is absolutely fine with me. I like the flexibility and optionality of not being tied down to the place (not that I plan to move from my current situation anytime soon). Renting prevents me from accumulating too much material things, because moving it all to the next location would be a huge chore. I’ve already made the decision to donate most of my books before I move next time. Everybody knows how much I read, no need to a have shelves full of books to show for vanity points.

While I may not be house poor, but I’m definitely car poor, and have been ever since I started making enough money to buy my own. A huge chunk of my income have always gone towards paying for and servicing the ownership of a car. But unlike my coworker who seem rather miserable in being house poor, I’m absolutely fine with spending money on cars. Because it’s the great passion of mine since I was young.

Be careful why you strive for

The movie The Menu. Ralph Fiennes plays a renowned chef that serves an exclusive clientele on a private island. As the evening goes on, the guests’ past misdeeds come back to haunt them in devastating fashion. Of the many messages to garner from this film, the one that stuck with me is: Fiennes’ character was happiest when he was just a lowly cook making fast food cheeseburgers.

Imagine that: this famous chef, with patrons paying thousands for a table, a stable of cooks under him, is not happy. All the striving for money and recognition cannot compete with the complete satisfaction of cooking a good cheeseburger. Be cautious of the achievement treadmill! Much like the hedonic treadmill, the pitfall is the state of being unsatisfied until blank happens. What happens then is you’ll always be miserable, because there’s always something else to chase after achieving the current thing.

Look at car enthusiasts with vast collections, or the not-so-rich enthusiasts who can’t seem to keep the same car around (that’s me!). The endless desire for something new and different causes us to forget how much we wanted the thing we currently have, and how happy we were - momentarily, it would seem - when we first got it. If I could do it all over again, I probably would have kept the 2016 Mazda Miata I had until now.

There’s happiness to be found in stasis. There’s got to be a reasonable endpoint to all the striving. After which we chase after new goals for the sake of them alone, and not because they will bring additional units of happiness - because they won’t. Reflect on whether that new thing or achievement is really what you want. I think if Fiennes’ character can do it all over again, he would have kept making cheeseburgers as just another cook in a kitchen.

Haight musings

A few weeks back on a Friday evening, my friend group gathered for a night of pizza and movie. We did so at one friend’s apartment, of course - who wants the hassle of actually going out? I haven’t done pizza and movie at a restaurant and theatre since high school. The local Century theatre had a Round Table Pizza right next to it. Back when we can barely scrape together enough cash for food and film. Funny how that works: the age I most want to go out and do stuff is precisely the age I don’t have any of my own money at all.

Thanks, mom and dad.

Nowadays I rather spend a Friday evening staying in. That said, we still have to physically go buy the pizza to-go. We went to this particular joint nearby in the Haight-Ashbury neighborhood. As the kids would say these days, the Haight was “lit” on a Friday night. The restaurants and bars were teeming with people celebrating a fortuitous start to the weekend, after a long week at work. I quite dig that atmosphere, even though I’m not keen to partake.

And neither are my friends. We were never the type to go out to bars on a Friday evening. I for one seldom drink alcohol, and loathe to spend money on the marked-up stuff in bars. Secondly, the parking situation in areas such as the Haight is rightfully horrendous. I’m the type that doesn’t like going to places where parking is difficult to find (there aren’t parking garages in these residential neighborhoods). Though I guess it should be easier, now that UBER is a thing? Or maybe not: there’s also an increased cadre of food delivery people.

Indeed we could’ve had those pizza delivered, but we’re one of the few (?) who still prefers to go pick up to-go food orders. The delivery fees attached to services like Doordash and Grubhub are outrageous. Just as I don’t like to pay mark-up on alcohol, I also don’t like paying mark-up on food. Besides, the way to do it is have your friend double-park the car while you go inside the restaurant to pick up. Teamwork!

Really passionate people

Recently, a friend adopted a two-year old dog from the local SPCA. The pit bull-terrier mix, named Chumley, is absolutely adorable when he is around humans. However, when he is around other dogs, things unfortunately get a bit barky and bitey. It seems in his previous life, Chumley’s relationship with fellow dogs was not the smoothest. He would be fine one minute, then lunge and attack suddenly. A snap change in demeanor that thus far have led to two dogs bitten (nothing severe, thankfully), and a wounded human hand.

Chumley’s adopted mother - my friend - is rightfully distraught. The thought that your dog cannot get along with other dogs - to the point of hurting them - is just about the worse for a dog owner. It’s like having a kid that cannot stop beating other kids up at school. Ultimately, you the parent is responsible and must take corrective action. But that’s what she signed up for, isn’t it? These rescue dogs end up at shelters for a reason, and it’s most likely not out of a good situation. It’s the duty of the adoptee to take on that responsibility, to change and rehabilitated the bad parts.

A far more noble undertaking than simply buying a puppy from a breeder. All the offense.

Thank god there are trainers out there who can recognize, diagnose, and treat the unpleasant behaviors out of dogs. Without these kind and passionate people, many maladaptive dogs would need to be put down. It’s no hyperbole to call them miracle workers. Chumley has only taken two lessons thus far, and the change we’ve seen is utterly dramatic. The road ahead is still long in terms of comfortably allowing him to mingle freely with other dogs, but we can at least see that he is able to change his behavior, and is quick to learn.

Deadly walking

Yesterday my housemate came back from a walk in utter shock. He almost got run over by a car at the major intersection near our home. The asshole driver went straight from a protected left turn lane - essentially running the straight red. Housemate had the right-of-way in crossing the intersection. The driver didn’t stop, even after making eye-contact. Despicable.

We’ve always felt that intersection to be fairly dangerous. For a major thoroughfare that intersects a street that flows into a mall, it really needs protected turn lanes on all four sides. Instead, only one side have left turning privileges with a dedicated green arrow. Crossing that street as a pedestrian we’re fighting cars wanting to turn left (and right) before the brief green is over. You absolutely cannot have your face in your smartphone when doing so: make sure cars are stopped before you proceed.

That’s the reason my housemate didn’t get seriously hurt - he was paying attention to traffic.

You know how people put dash-cam in their cars to record evidence in case of accidents? (One of my favorite channels on YouTube is a compilation of these type of recordings.) Perhaps pedestrians need personal dash-cams as well when walking through these dangerous intersections. Before crossing, start an instagram live stream just so there’s evidence being saved to the cloud, should you get run over by a car.

Rightly or wrongly, the onus is on the pedestrian to pay absolute attention at all times. It’s a matter of physics: you the person is magnitudes smaller than a multi-ton car that moves rapidly. So what if you have the right-of-way and the offending driver is in the wrong? You’re dead. For sure in a more perfect society we wouldn’t have to be so vigilant. But yesterday’s episode with my housemate shows, self preservation comes first.

Doing nothing that costs nothing

Recently I saw on television a commercial for vacation rentals. The tagline was you can get away to some place from home and do absolutely nothing. Just chill on the beach, or on the deck of the rental. To escape the hustle and bustle of your regular life.

To the advert I remarked, “Wait a minute, I can do nothing right at home!”

It’s rather absurd that someone needs to spend thousands of dollar to fly somewhere simply to do nothing. I on the other hand try to do so every Saturday. I greatly admire the Jewish tradition of Shabbat (and the Christian sabbath equivalent). Adherents abstain from any type of manual labor from sundown Friday to sundown Saturday. It is pure leisure for 24 hours. A mini vacation every single week, if you will.

I love that idea. After a week of busting ass at work and taking care of chores at home, it’s good to take a pause. Otherwise, what’s the point of working? Isn’t it ultimately to buy more free time? (Beyond the basic food and shelter stuff.) The brand of hustle culture that makes you feel guilty for lethargy on weekends is utterly toxic. To fill every waking hour with “productivity” and “self improvement” is how you get burned out. That’s how you speed-run through life, always onto the next task.

That was me.

Here’s my ideal Saturday morning these days: wake up and make coffee. Then sit in front the window drinking that coffee while listening to music for the next two hours or so. No social media, no YouTube. Only the sounds out of the speakers and the view out the window. Can you do that without the urge to grab your smartphone?